Haven’t gone to sleep. Still counts.
In which I say some really controversial shit. Really. So just… breeze right by this if you’re easily angered.
First and foremost, I absolutely don’t condone rape, nor do I think it is a crime that should be ignored or taken as anything less serious than what it is, the most extreme and vile violation of another individual.
First issue: “don’t teach women how not to get raped, teach men not to rape” and every phrase similar to that. I understand the sentiment. I do. But you know what? I lock my car at night. And I’m highly aware of everyone around me when I’m walking around late at night. And I set the alarm when I leave my house. Because I don’t want my car stolen, and because I don’t want to be mugged, and because I don’t want my house burglarized. I’m sure people are taught not to steal, but they do. And I don’t think there is anything wrong with actively defending yourself against a crime. I feel like I understand what they’re trying to say in this message–that rape shouldn’t happen in the first place–but I feel like this just suggests that we shouldn’t do anything to protect ourselves because they’re the criminals. I know people shouldn’t commit crimes, but why can’t we defend ourselves against criminals too? Can’t we do both?
Second, getting mad when rape victims are questioned at length by school boards or attorneys. I know it feels like this shouldn’t happen because of the traumatizing nature of the offense, but at the end of the day, this is a crime. Guilt must be proven beyond a reasonable doubt. And as much as this crime is a very serious offense, it is a VERY serious accusation to make of someone. I can’t point at someone and say “that man burned my house down” and expect him to be charged for arson immediately. I know it doesn’t seem this way at times, but the goal of the legal process is to be fair. To charge people who are guilty and not to charge people who are innocent. All the questions are to make sure this happens. No matter how gruesome the crime, the questions are asked because the scales must tip clearly and irrefutably in favor of a guilty charge. The difficult thing is that rape involves something that cannot be quantified or proven with facts: consent. This is scary because either party can lie about it and no one can really refute either claim. tl;dr: the questions are not because they’re being insensitive, it’s because they’re doing their job.
I guess it’s really just those two points. They aren’t well fleshed out and they probably hardly make sense, but I just felt like I had to say it.